Running can be a pain in the ASS

For my friends out there who have wondered where I have gone and why I haven’t posted in weeks, and why I hadn’t kept up with my marathon weekly updates, and why I did not run the full marathon, well … here it is. The good, the bad and the K-Y Jelly.

I was finishing up week 7 of my training, when things started to take a turn. No, I wasn’t sick. I didn’t have IT band problems, or shin splints, or even a pulled hammy. My training was going GREAT! I was ready to PR at the California International Marathon on December 4, 2011. That was, until, my 16 mile run in week 7. I ran with my friend Jess and was uncomfortable, which is not unusual. I like the saying, “get comfortable with uncomfortable.” I just chalked my uncomfortableness with my new Capri tights. I finished my run and couldn’t get them off fast enough. Jumping in the shower to clean off, I had that hot water on chaffed skin sort of feeling, only it wasn’t where I expected it might be. Oh no … it was somewhere else entirely. Not the same wave of discomfort I had felt on so many other occasions when I forgot to use body glide in certain areas, usually around my jog bra. This day, I was screaming from the pain coming from my ASS region! How on earth could I have chaffed on my butt? That has never happened before, and surely, it must have been my new running Capri tights. It HAD to be.

Then a thought occurred to me, maybe I had a hemorrhoid … that area hurt too. Shake it off GINA … you’re tough. Put some ointment down there and all will be well again. Preparation H? Vaseline? A&D ointment? I searched my drawers and decided I might as well use them all since I didn’t know what the hell was wrong. EEEOWWWWW! Preparation H stung. The Vaseline was just plain gooey and gross. And, the A&D ointment reminded me of changing diapers, which I hadn’t done for 10 years. Maybe this ointment is that old? Ok, back on subject …

Now see, I’ve been in all sorts of pain before, both mental and physical. I felt like I could talk my way through this and buck up. I took the dog for a walk – I attempted to take the dog for a walk after my shower, but only got about 1/4 mile down the road when I felt a pain that brought me to a halt. In fact, it hurt to even walk. It was like a really strong bourbon or whiskey with some thumb tacks thrown in as a garnish going down my throat. Only, it wasn’t my throat for this analogy … it was, uh-hem – my ASS!

I turned around, apologizing to Copper boy and told him we would go tomorrow for sure. I no longer made it home and had an unusual thing happen. Not the sort of thing one likes talking about, much less writing about … maybe, that’s why I haven’t written anything in such a long time … I mean, how do you tell people … and more importantly, who wants to know that I had bleeding out my ass?! It was scary and I was mad as hell. This cannot be happening …

I went to see the doc, because this had to be a normal occurrence in runners. Right? I mean, I can’t be the only one with this sort of issue. Right? Off I went to the doctors to see about my ass ….

I was not happy

I mean, who wants to wait for the doctor and stare at this:

K-Y Jelly and some latex gloves. This can’t be good OR fun. After my not so fun exam, I was told I could keep running and to help with the pain, I was given these steroid suppositories. EWW! My doctor also informed me she would making me an appointment for a colonoscopy. UGH. OK. I guess, if I have to.

I continued running, but the pain and the bleeding did not subside. Between my coach and I, we decided to let the marathon go and focus on getting healthy for the TRI season of 2012. Instead of running the full marathon, I found a great team to run with as part of the marathon relay instead. This was a highlight of my trip to Sacramento. More on this later!

Anyhoo… next week, is the dreaded colonoscopy. Thankfully, I’ve been able to keep busy with the work and holiday parties, to not dwell on the fact that I miss running so much. So, I’ve been a bit crabby, who wouldn’t? Even if running has been a pain in my ASS of late, I still love it.

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4 responses to “Running can be a pain in the ASS

  1. I sure hope you find out some news! Do you still think it is partly a gluten or food allergy problem?

  2. I’m on the list for that C procedure as well, but they say it might be years before I bubble to the top. I have friends that have done it. By all accounts the preparatory clean out procedure is by far the worst of it. Plan ahead. Make sure the bathroom is a well stocked comfy place. You won’t be leaving it.
    And no, so far in mucho blog reading, I have not come across anyone discussing blood from there.

  3. 😦 super sad face…

    Miss you!

  4. Pingback: If you can’t marathon…RELAY! | swimbikerun4fun

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